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When Love Finds You

Publishing Date : 25 March, 2019

Author : AUBREY LUTE

A friendly therapy radio show on RB2, ‘Your Destiny’ led to multitudes visiting health posts for assessment. It was a simple request from the host, Do you think you have depression? Kindly check with your nearest health post, and the numbers were riveting! It was established that a majority of those who visited indeed have depression!


Now Koziba Malibala in partnership with the University of Botswana and her South African based brand management company are working around the clock to put up a result oriented two day conference that will deal with some of the core causes of depression. “We are planning to host a Relationship Conference sometime in August, we are yet to finalise the dates,” she said.  


She says: Without the right approach, depression can take a toll on intimate relationships, making both partners feel disconnected. Malibala quickly points out that depression is a difficult illness that darkens your thoughts and feelings. It saps your self-esteem, energy, motivation and interest in anything. It’s also tough on romantic relationships.


According to Malibala a healthy relationship will lead to a healthy nation, “if our relationships are not healthy we will not be able to perform at our various work stations and this will negatively impact the economy,” she observes. The theme for the Relationship Conference is, ‘When Love Finds You, Are you Emotionally Available and ready?’ Malibala says they have decided to zoom into relationships because it has been established that most of those who were found to be depressed got to where they are because of relationships and financial issues. “To emphasise further, the financial situations arose because of the condition of the relationships,” she shares.


Malibala appreciates that people are beginning to understand depression better as awareness grows. “I used my radio slot to raise awareness on this issue because it is misunderstood. I am happy with the feedback we are getting. This could go a long way in helping to address other social ills affecting our nation,” she says when referring to the impact the Relationship Conference may harvest.


Malibala’s concern is that “less understood, however, are the ways in which depression can affect relationships and how your relationships can help people manage depression.” Depression is a master manipulator, Malibala says the primary feature of depression is falsification, meaning your perception of life — including your relationship — is easily confused and denoted in a more undesirable fashion.”


Because she is on radio hence the media space, Malibala has been able to observe and appreciate how the First Family, President Dr Mokgweetsi Masisi and First Lady, Neo Masisi are exuding positive influence on a lot of relationships and marriages. She is working hard to have them both do the official opening of the Relationship Conference. “We want to shape this society in the direction that will reduce depression and its related causes. Having the first family at the event will surely demonstrate that as a country we want to defeat this monster manipulator called depression.”


Various speakers from diverse backgrounds are lineup for the conference which shall be divided into three segments. Psychologists, Life coaches, motivational speakers, authors, and medical doctors are some of the experts who will make punchy presentations and offer remedies at the conference. Malibala says they expect to also hear from successful couples at the conference and they have chosen to apportion such couples according to sectors, “we will have successful couples from the sport, legal, royal and other fraternities,” she says.


The tickets to the conference will sold at corporate and individual levels. Proceeds from the conference will be used to help some of the patrons who have been affected by depression as a result of relationships. “One of our guests who will give a testimony is a lady who was made to quit her studies to become a wife to one of the charismatic church pastors, after having four kids in a marriage she was divorced and left on her own. She fell into depression and when she tried to go back to school, she was told she was above sponsorship age limit.” Malibala says they want these kind of stories to come to the fore so that people become aware.


According to psychologist Shannon Kolakowski, PsyD, in her book When Depression Hurts Your Relationship: How to Regain Intimacy and Reconnect with Your Partner When You’re Depressed, depression diminishes your ability to connect with your partner and creates doubts about your union. Symptoms such as anger and irritability can create tension between partners.

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